Beware: Rabid Commenter on the Loose

Readers' comments are the lifeblood of a blog. A high volume of traffic may come and go, ratcheting up your AdSense earnings, but they don't stick. I have read somewhere these kinds of visitors come to your blog, consume the free beer and off they go. Faithful readers who care to leave comments on your posts are different:

* They inspire you do more and make you feel you're not alone in the wilderness.

* They teach you with their inputs and open you to a different point of view.

* They challenge you and your core beliefs and make you accountable.

* They make you laugh -they have strange ways of making you lighten up when you sometimes become so full of yourself.

* They make you grow - after all they see a potential in you long before you have gained a firm assurance of your self-worth. You have no choice. You simply have to grow.

Yeah, right. Wait until you've seen me in action as a commentator.

You would have thought that with all your effort, a fairly reasonable man will assume I have progressed a lot as a human being. Alas, three months is not enough to hone that rough diamond you're interacting with on this blog. Because I have proven to be just a clump of carbon.

So basically it's your fault.

To get on with my story -here's my confession.

I spent the whole day comment sniping in Jaypee's blog - meaning I sneaked in every chance I got during lulls in my day job. He had a contest going for top commentator for February. At stake is a WordPress t-shirt, a fistful of dollars (okay, okay $15), and WP plug in of some sort. Up until yesterday, I thought I was comfortably ahead by several comments. Woke up this morning to see Elmot a fellow blogspot author literally blitzing to the top. I was second, but a far second.

So dear readers, guess what. Here's the ugly part. Your good friend here made a commenting frenzy never seen before at least in these parts. I became unhinged. Bah, I will not be denied that t-shirt. I already have seen it hanging in my closet after all.

In a matter of hours, I have commented about Ubuntu, defended my about-face about Kindle2 (sneezed at it in my previous comment), fell in love Shaq and his fancy dance moves, critiqued iPhones as if I had the means to buy one, and generally wrapped my feeble brain around many other technical topics - geeky stuff - that I'm so tired and irritated at this point.

It's not as if the whole island of Mindoro will sink to the bottom of the sea if I did not win it. It's only a t-shirt for crying out loud.

Update: As of this writing, me and Elmot are tied in first place with 42. I'm giving up though. I have made a good account of myself, I think. To go on will be simply ridiculous and that's putting it kindly.

Besides, I'm on the road to Manila as you're reading this and will not be able to add to that measly 42. Waaah. So there's my excuse for losing. :)

You can check out Jaypee's site to see how a sedate blogger can suddenly turn rabid. When a fellow reader on the blog asks you if you know me it's entirely probable we'd still be friends even if you denied ever knowing me. I understand.

I think I need a therapist more than I need a Kindle2 e-reader or even that prized WP t-shirt. As for Jaypee - maybe he needs a reflexologist because he took great pains answering every comment made on his blog by personal email - not an auto responder. Consider the stats at this point for the top two - 42 x 2. His keyboard must be darn hot by now.

Maybe I don't need a therapist after all, after imagining Jaypee's anguish. One more day, Jaypee. Just one more day and you're done.

Ciao.

Here's Elmot's account why the top commentator award slipped through his fingers.

Tags: blogging, blog commenting

Related articles by Zemanta

• Any Strange Blogging Habits? (blogherald.com)
• The Essential Guide to Growing Your Blog on Minimal Time (problogger.net)

Little Known Way to Overcome the Fear of Writing

This post is inspired by Sonia Simone's advice to web writers who agonize over their writing. Is it good enough to be read? Will I be ridiculed for posting this idea on my blog? Preconceived notions have the power to shackle new authors, resulting in frustration and half-baked creative output.

She made a superb list of pointers for "growing" a blog post. The most helpful to me as a new web writer is her advice to just write the first draft. And never worry that it's horrible, full of gunk and stupid. There's a time for pruning and tightening what you write. But that is for later. The most pressing task is to first get it out of your system.

I find this advice remarkable because I'm the kind of writer who agonizes over every sentence I make. No wonder it's taking me hours to just nail a simple post. All right, I usually lock myself in my room, free from outside distraction. I close my email program and Facebook page. But I have let in an interloper in the room, an internal editor who keeps thumbing down this word and insulting me for coming up with that idea.

This grumpy interloper simply has to go. You're too much of a nuisance and just have to wait for your turn, Mr. Editor.

I'm making this advice a part of my creative process. Free writing is the key to unleash that creative burst of inspiration.

Says Sonia Simone:

You are not an air traffic controller. If you write a post that’s not very good, or that people just can’t get into, the world will not come to an end. No one will be maimed or die. No innocent puppies will suffer.

How do you make yourself productive? What inspiration have you found that keeps you winning in your battle with that empty page? Do your tricks do wonders for you, leaving your ego and puppies well enough alone and happy?

Tags: blogging tips, free writing, writing advice

My Wet Dream and Other Birthday Wishes

Consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative. - Oscar Wilde

If I hate being tagged before, I say I love this now. I hope that explains this 360 degrees turn. But don't get any weird ideas - because I'm doing this only for Bingkee.

Here goes:



1. My birthday is still months away. September. I can make it earlier, say tomorrow if you humor me with a gift of love: Kindle2 e-reader. Not only can it store more than 1,500 books it is also a book-buying machine - this e-reader can download new book releases. No more hassle of going to bookstores. And the blurb says your kindle 2 can access online publications and blogs. Wow.

2. I have to make allowances because of the economic downturn. Job losses everywhere. Gosh, it's pretty bleak out there. That means I can live with paperback or hardbound books. I'd earnestly pray for the eternal repose of those dead trees, I promise.

3. Moleskine notebooks for my note-taking. So I can jot down ideas for blog posts. And list blog authors who cross me. I read them faithfully - okay I skip a post or two - and each time makes a perfect cartwheel on their blog, bang my head against the wall so I can be induced to comment if a particular post intrigues me. But some bloggers conduct their business with their heads in the clouds. No time for a sweaty pedestrian like me. Nothing. Might have found a warmer welcome in an Eskimo's igloo.

4. But that's okay, nothing that a sturdy notebook can dispel. What do I need it for?

5. So I can blog in style - drink coffee in Paris, visit some museums, and learn to cuss in French.

6. Or visit the beaches in Thailand.

7. Buy danggit and seafood and delicacies in Cebu.

8. But I'm realistic and just your regular guy. So I can settle for more sleep and good health to maintain stamina in blogging.

9. And a fully functioning brain so I can be receptive to new blog ideas. And a little deviousness too to make my efforts less cloying.

10. And yes, less tagging so I can get on reading other blogs, for pete's sake.

With much glee, I'm tormenting ten blogger friends so they can post 10 birthday wishes as well. It says so in the tag rules. Don't bury your head in the sand, I know perfectly well who you are. Those who have it coming are as follows:

1. Elizabeth - All About Elizabeth
2. Jade - Xprosaic
3. Caryn - Sari-saring Kulay
4. Marites -Believe and Achieve
5. Gagay - Walking Newspaper
6. Jason - Pinoy Updates
7. Adrian - Auditoire
8. Normand -The Blogger Next Door
9. Kelvin - Kelvinonian Ideas 2.0
10. James - Words For Everything

Recommended Reading: Tag Me, What is this?

Word Association On A Lazy Sunday Evening

It's a lazy Sunday evening and I want to play word of association with you. You know, I say a word and you answer with another word. Fast. No editing of thoughts. Whichever word comes first.

Why so? Silly, it's the object of the game. To uncover strange and amusing associations you make with words. Wouldn't that be fun!

Okay, I go first. I'd come up with a list and your answers will be blog authors or things related to blogging. Or anything, if nothing comes to mind. Fair enough? After I'm done be a sport and put in your answers in the comment section.

1. pocket - lover
   
2. lust - webhost
   
3. dream - WordPress
   
4. commonsense - Joel
   
5. stalker - conscience
   
6. love - movies
   
7. writer - heretic
   
8. design - Boagworld
   
9. funny - mysteries
   
10. wet-dream - Kindle2

Here's a video for those who first need a tutorial before they can make a decision. Enjoy.

Hotshot On The Web, A Nobody At Home

Is it not remarkable you're making progress on your way to being an internet hotshot while at home you're still the same old you? The folks at home do not regard you any differently. Well, get over it.

This post is inspired by Diane who commented on my sister's incredulous remarks, "He's (meaning me) got a blog? What's a blog?" This is Diane's engaging anecdote:

A small group of my very close friends were together a few months ago and one of them said, "Do you guys read Diane's blog? I read it all the time, it's great." Another woman said, "I don't know how that works." I started to explain that you don't have to know how it works, you just go to the web address and read it. Then she said, "What's a blog?" :-) It's interesting to me how the human race can be all over the board as far as technology. We have people who are ultra tech savvy and then people who are living off the land and have no computer at all.

Diane, we have two computers at home. But it is to my sister's credit she'd rather chat up her beloved potted flowers than swap pleasantries with total strangers in Facebook. Sorry, Matt Zuckerberg, that's just the way it is.

My other sister - the brainiest in the family - has this ability to startle passersby. No, she's not arguing with her husband. She's just being herself - shaking her broom at the mango trees that ring her house - dressing down the hapless trees as if they were belligerent children. Just because they have the gall to make her household chores more difficult. She would have made a fine Dooce this side of Asia, but she will have to be dragged to the computer - to any contraption that requires plugging into the wall socket in fact. Her only concession to technology is receiving a mobile call, which means I press the answer button on my mobile and pass it on to her. Owning one is not her cup of tea.

I find it odd that I keep baring myself before this contraption called the computer and telling it stories as if it were a friend in the flesh. But at least the minute I hit the publish button my readers gleefully sprint to be the first commenter - at least I think so. Even my one-liners get retwitted in Twitter sometimes. At home, I have to work just as hard to get myself heard at the dinner table. It doesn't matter to them Robert Scoble followed me in Twitter, or that Steve Pavlina friended me on Facebook. Or that Chris Brogan included my blog in his Rockstar links.

It doesn't matter. I still have to take out the garbage. I still get the honors of opening tin cans and uncooperative lid jars. Family and friends both have uncanny ability to make you grounded. You're still you - obscure and unheralded. That's maybe for the best.

So what stories do you have about blogging and your family, relatives and friends' strange ideas about it?

Tags: blogging

Aw Shucks - Darren Rowse Killed My Blog

Image via Wikipedia

Darren Rowse asked in his blog, "If your blog died today, what would it be remembered for?" The following post is my reply to this morbid two-part scenario. We are now off to 2019 and I have just decided to end this blog. Here's my obituary:

Jan of salabasngmandaluyong wrote finis to a 10-year blogging career that has been distinguished by exemplary writing and clarity of vision.

He had a wobbly start at blogger.com - a prolific web author who had increasingly become self-conscious that he was living under the bridge in the blogosphere. But he had made the transition to WP and an independent web host. From then on, he had become more self-assured and found his voice, which he increasingly used to deflate the egos of web snake charmers with their pet theories on SEO and get-rich schemes. He refused to call them writers. "They're nothing but hacks, lowly and greasy mechanics."

His blog is studded with elegant and humorous reflections on writing, technology and contemporary issues that bedevil mankind.

He had achieved recognition by seeking anonymity and shunning the social scene. On balance, his blog put up a good fight, but it had lost on many fronts:

• He lost to a formidable swarm of cliches he found despicable. Rocket science, breath of fresh air, and their ilk - while apparently not as popular as before - have all outlived Jan's blog.
• He championed the true art of writing your passion as a blogger.Thousands of new information workers who joined daily the make money online bandwagon did not hear him and those who took notice thought him quaint and a little touched in the head.
• He had sought enlightenment and self-discovery through his web writing, but his stint as a blogger only brought him fame, modest money in the bank, and beer belly from leading a sedentary life.

Jan, however, had remained steadfast on his creative blogging philosophy he attributed to Skellie. He wrote from the heart and refused to pay heed to momentary buzz in the internet that powers hordes of traffic to a web author's site. His blog friends found it amusing that for a forgetful guy he had Skellie's words seared on his consciousness:

The key thing that makes it (creative blogging) so often overlooked is that it builds slowly but surely. Because you’re not following a formula people have already been conditioned to respond to, it’s going to take time for the value of what you’re doing to spread. But it will do so inexorably. And when it does, your slow rising star will overtake those of other bloggers who have been chasing peaks without building something never seen before.

Jan's slow rising star was just starting to get noticed when he made this startling decision to quit blogging. He had rubbed elbows and drank beer with the likes of Chris Brogan, Darren Rowse and Brian Clark. He is not yet spat upon, or knifed - he's not that famous yet. But friends see Jan as a deer caught in the headlights (sorry for this cliche Jan, this can't be helped). He's not comfortable with it.

Perhaps he's made good on his empty threat to go to England to learn the fine art of gardening.

Or maybe he's holding court in Bora Bora, teaching the natives about blogging. Or thinking up ways on how to make a comeback. Who knows?

Part 2 - An obituary for this blog as it stands today

Salabasngmandaluyong was hacked today and its author Jan decided to delete it altogether, Yatot announced in TYC. He spent all day sending messages to a handful of Jan's friends in Facebook, Twitter and Friendster.

Readers reactions:

1. Jojigirl - No skin off my nose. I'd be as poised as the woman in this video.
   
2. Tonex - Uh - oh, I would have designed a minimalist theme for him had he stayed longer!
   
3. Ann Handley: Who he? Maybe it's just one of those random things.
   
4. Jan's sister: He's got a blog? What's a blog?
5. Jan's dog: Let him be. As James Thurber says, "Nowadays men live by noisy desperation." He chucks the noise, let him deal with the other one.

What would people miss about this blog? Consensus: the interaction.

What has this blog achieved? Verdict: Nothing you can put a finger on, but yeah, the potentiality of this blog becoming better in the months to come.

Has it fulfilled a need or service in people's lives? General agreement: Too early to tell.

What ground has it broken? After the huddle: Give the guy a break. He had blogged for all of two months. Seriously though, nothing. But he might have surprised us in the future had he stuck with blogging.

So, if it were your blog's demise today - what do you think will the obituary read like?

Tags: blogging, goals

Why Mom Blogs Rule

Image via Wikipedia

Don't you think it's rather odd that mom blogs comprise the bulk of my blog list? I'm beginning to think so myself. The more pressing issue, however, is this - do mom blogs indeed rule the web in terms of content, coolness, artistry and power?

Mom blogs are just so cool. And speaking of content - they're hard to beat. In fact, I'm beginning to suspect they reign supreme over bloggers of the opposite sex without even breaking a sweat. It's good to know in the web there's no glass ceiling that hinders mom blogs progress. Blogging is just so their natural habitat.

Here are my tentative findings why they rule the web:

Because they are creators without equal. After all if one can conceive life, go through nine months of pregnancy and the ordeal of childbirth - what's a blog to stop her at her tracks? In the grand scheme of things, blogs are a walk in the park. Throw moms a more worthy challenge.

Because moms are the true masters of language.

Because moms have it all down pat to an exact science. Did I hear a collective groan from you guys? Close your trap now. And do something productive - here is Jo's post to get you up to speed on the geography of men and women.

Because moms wield the economic power. On her say so things are bought from trinkets to major purchases. Says Michelle Mitchell in her guest post written for ProBlogger, "You’ve heard 'The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world'? Well she who does the shopping then blogs about it rules the net."

Because moms are tough. "A woman is like a tea bag," says Eleonor Roosevelt "- you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water."

Or until she discovers blogging.

What do you think guys? Should I take up gardening instead?

A Perfect Blend of Friendship Award

Just because I choose to go it alone on Valentine's Day doesn't necessarily mean I'd fail to use my time productively. Might as well give awards to friends and those I hope to be friends with online.

Ismail of Passionate About Blogging honored me with this Friendship Award early February. It's hard to argue with lawyers - you know how they can slap you with restraining orders and stuff - so I accepted it and promptly filed it away. Thank you, Ismail. Indeed, you have discriminating taste.

Now is the time to pay it forward. The awardees are a happy mix of online friends and new acquaintances. I hope you will all promptly recover from the devastation Valentine's Day brings to your purse and ego as the case maybe. If you're still huffing and puffing from your juvenile assignations, pick up your awards later, you lucky dogs.

The honorees are:

1. Yatot of The Yatot Chronicles
2. Jhez of My Not So Personal Blog
3. Dee of Tales From The Mom Side
4. Jojigirl of Rainbows and Thunderstorms
5. Tonex of Blog Ex Machina
6. Jaypee of Jaypee Online
7. Ms. Earth of Earthlingorgeous
8. Diane of Just Humor Me
9. A friend who is suffering from multiple ironies - Pinay Single Mommy
10. Jed who is after our personal growth by plotting to make us better bloggers.
11. Bingkee of I Love Hate America
12. Gagay who went inside the minds of guys so she could write a list of reminders for girls. Example: "Don't rub the lamp if you don't want to see the genie."

Now it's your turn to pass this on to pals and even acquaintances - you know, people who Ambrose Pierce describes as "person(s) whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to."

Recommended Reading especially on Valentine's Day is this exquisite story posted by Jason. It's in Filipino - I wish it will be translated in English soon.

Another good read on Valentine's Day - and every time we feel mushy and romantic - is Cupid and Psyche written by Jo of A Majority of Two.

# 1 Productivity Tip: Let Your Friend Do It

Image by ♥ China ♥ guccio via Flickr

I don't believe in procrastination. If a task is worth doing, and it has to be done today then obviously you don't need to read up on productivity experts on the web.

And you don't need an e-book to do it either. Nor you need to read the sky to see if certain stars are aligned properly so you can start on your work. It's this way with this blog. It needs a new look so the logical thing is to buckle down to work and get dirty. And I did precisely that - sent a message to my friend Yatot and gave him the go signal to tweak this blog.

And he just did it. Hurray, for getting things done. Oh, I'm so decisive, don't you think?

Do you like the new look? Looks like a proper blog to me now compared with the generic look of the previous one. This baby has -

1. About Page - don't check yet. I'm still working on it. Sheesh. You're so click happy.

2. Contact Page - now you don't have to jostle with spam in my inbox to get my attention. Greater chances of me reading and responding to your email.

3. Privacy Policy - Can live without one, but apparently Google Adsense requires it. So I have to humor the big G. There.

4. Snazzy features - it has Twitter icon and a slew of social bookmarks you can click to humor Jan.

Yatot went under the hood and did all the dirty work from morning till lunch. He's in Metro Manila while I'm in the boondocks, still among my Mangyan brothers. The magic of online collaboration.

FYI, I did some heavy lifting, too, to wit:

1. Complained of dizziness when presented with templates to choose from.

2. Delegated with a heavy heart the matter of picking the right design and prayed hard it won't be too awful. It's coolacious!

3. Frantically typed "Bravo" when presented with his final choice. Which became our choice.

4. Pestered him to add more tabs, a tweetie bird, and the bookmarks at the end of each post.

5. Exhausted my weeks supply of approbation: "sweet! perfect!" "you're the man!" " dude, wow!" "are you crazy? next idea please!"

The end result is that by 12:00 noon one extremely famished and aggravated friend went to lunch, perhaps wondering what he got himself into. And this blogger? Not too shabby, I dare say. I'm so happy I look like Joker with a grin stretched from ear to ear.

Thanks, Yatot. You're one tech savvy Angel.

Note:

* One unintended casualty of rearranging the furniture around here is that my premium blog list was misplaced in the shuffle. If you are on my blogroll and I forgot to put you back in, please tell me. If you want to be included, please don't ask. Ninety-eight percent of those special people did not ask me. I just did it on my own. But of course I can be persuaded, too. :)

* Top Commentator on the sidebar reflects the overall score of readers from day one. It doesn't reflect your score for February. So don't feel sorry for yourself if you're not within striking distance of the top commentators. To ensure fair play, I leave the job of tallying the votes to the prestigious accounting firm SGV which offered their services gratis in exchange for brief mention hereabouts.

Link Goodies For Your Pleasure

Here are some link goodies for your pleasure.

To Make You Laugh:

1. Jojigirl aims for our jugular, er funny bones with a wicked post. She claims innocence, denying she's written it herself. It's laugh out loud funny nevertheless - This Computer-Savvy Wife Got a Problem

2. I'd gladly give Dee a hefty retainer for writing this hilarious piece. - 10 Excuses If You Were Caught Sleeping At Work

3. Diane Fitzpatrick is just tinkering with her blog when her entire site disappears. Or so she says. Check out her humorous experience with tech support. - Cookies For the Apple Genius

To Make You a Better Blogger:

1. Subject-verb agreement still boggles your mind? Befriend this grammar police before she hunts you down - Gege

2. David Pierce exhorts writers to make your writing sticky and effective by making your readers the focal point of your piece.

3. On the off chance you haven't read this yet I'm recommending a Brian Clark post. I don't know the exact date, but when Brian climbed down from the mountain he brought down a tablet which contains Ten Commandments for writers . Priceless.

To Make You Earn More Money:

1. Be $150 richer. If you're knowledgeable about PHP, AJAX, jQuery, Wordpress, or HTML/CSS and can write a tutorial and screencast try this - NETTUTS+ Writers Needed!

2. Solve Jehzeel's next puzzle - a contest on his blog - and earn $ 50 and other prizes. The mechanics will be posted soon, but in this post you'd see a preview of his next puzzle contest - The Blue Stickman First IQ Puzzle Winner Is...

3. Will have to thank Marghil for this find. Just the job for you, dudes - Wanted: Condom Testers

To Help You Achieve Your Goals:

1. To help you snap out of whatever it is that gets you tied down - Conquer the Fears Lurking in the Dark Corners of Your Mind

2. Pardon me, but what's holding you back? Go for it, man. - You Are Enough


Enjoy. I'm off to Twitter now. Are you coming?

10 Traits Of A Die Hard Blogger

Image by jack_spellingbacon via Flickr

Here I am taking a breather from my grim pursuit of rockstar status in blogging to bring you some findings. This blog turned two months old last February 4 and I took stock of traits that kept me from dying of hypothermia in the perilous sea of blogging:

1. Be not afraid to be wrong. When faced with difficult choices, go ahead and write your convictions with gusto. Don't be wishy washy. Stand your ground. Don't create little loopholes wherein you can scurry when what you say backfires on you. The blogosphere is full of blog authors who sally forth from point A to point B as if they're walking on eggs. One kind of originality is the courage to be wrong. This sets you apart from the garden variety type of authors out there.

Says Jonathan Morrow in How To Be Interesting, "The world is full of people trying to do the right things. It’s become so common that many of us are bored by it. We long for someone that is willing to do the wrong thing, say the wrong thing, be the wrong thing. If you have the courage to be that person, you’ll find lots of people paying attention to you."

I went out on a limb to write this . Because I am not afraid to be wrong. A couple of blog friends candidly put me to task. Bingkee because she's taking up the cudgels for the average readers, while Mye made light of the fact my post caused her to "nosebleed." The end result is that I almost conceded my mistake. Almost wrote my concession speech, but what do you know, another friend goaded me to be myself. And I did. So it's Yatot's "fault" I'm this hardheaded. :)

2. Be humble. Own up to your mistakes. This is a remarkable human trait we find in real life. And it applies to online interactions as well.

Dee called me out in the comment section about a mistake in attribution in this post . But she made it sound okay that I became fascinated about her. Turns out Dee's encyclopedic knowledge does not only encompass the vast fields of learning especially about the law but anything and everything about Angelina Jolie as well. Another moral lesson: be careful around lawyers. :)

I was so uppity with awards and so full of myself . I am sorry if I have offended some well-meaning readers and friends. After some thought, I can't simply be the blogging community's version of Marlon Brando anymore - he declined his Oscar trophy for the The Godfather. Okay, I will accept them. Provided I'd be free to sprinkle my posts about them with healthy helpings of skepticism and some fun. Just to stress we're not firm believers of our own hype. Done deal then.

3. Be accessible. Interact with your readers through the comments section of your blog. Shoot them an email thanking them for their perceptive comments. Chat them up in social chat platforms.

Jaypee is one good example of this wonderful trait a blogger should have. If you leave a comment on his site, he'd email you to say his thanks. And the remarkable part is that you're conversing here with Jaypee and not an autoresponder. How about that for personal appreciation? He gives away gifts for top commentators on his blog as well. What more can you ask?

4. Keep your day job. This is mainly for people like me whose blog has yet to gain traction in terms of traffic and readership. If truth be told, the best stuff you can buy with your first and second monthly earnings combined is a packet of instant coffee, and a kilo or two of brown sugar. What creamer are you talking about - are you nuts?

Besides, it's great to be out there in the work place. If you look hard enough, you'd find lots of blog post ideas not only around the office cooler but practically anywhere. In your friend's dangerous liaisons. In your nemesis' talent for ass-kissing to climb up in the corporate ladder. It's not backstabbing. It's called creative blogging. Whip out your notebooks, these are fodder for your posts.

5. It's not all about the money. Of course, it will be wonderful to finally buy a laptop so I can be a peripatetic blogger. I'd take it to the wet market and if a particular conversation among the fish vendors strikes me as irresistible, I'd live blog it. So I did the next alternative: Cut out a glossy picture of this fancy laptop and taped it to my aging desktop instead. That's one goal to keep the blogging fires burning. In psychology they call this sublimation - channeling one's energy or lust for something into a more productive pursuit.

The reality is that money doesn't figure at all in the equation. I blog because I have to. For Pete's sake, I gave up American Idol for it. And Jack Bauer. Before I discovered blogging, I keep a disorderly room. With blogging, it has become even more chaotic. God knows what frightful germs have spawned there. The upshot is that I have an updated blog. Hehehe. I can live with minor setbacks.

6. Be yourself. You're a remarkable fellow, trust me. They don't make the likes of you anymore, anywhere. You can call yourself an endangered species if you want. Because you truly are. There's no need to parrot anybody who you thought to be witty. Maybe they are. But you have other qualities to outshine the whole lot of them. Find it in yourself. It's not something you have to acquire like a set of skills. Your style is who you are as a person. Let him/her out.

I have a friend in BlogCatalog. He's from Southeast Asia. Everytime a fellow blogger broadcasts a post, he's first to comment. All he says is "Thank You." No matter if you're ranting about the shenanigans in local politics he'd say thank you. You had almost busted a vein thinking up original post on how to wrangle a date with a hot prospect this Valentine and he'd write his thanks. Very polite and always accessible. Maybe he's an extreme case but I think you get the point.

By the way, he's active in Twitter, too. One time he's done tweeting in his native tongue. Then he started tweeting about a sequence of numbers. 0-1. Minutes later, 1-1. Intrigued, I asked him what's with him. And he said, "Soccer score." With all the vocabulary at my disposable, all I can say in reply was a wimpish "thank you."

7. Reinvent yourself. I started as plain Gani. Then I changed it to Jan. Now, that sounds properly Eastern European and I like it. :) The possibilities are endless. Seriously, you can learn on the side many wonderful things on the net. Be a photographer. Be a topnotch video maker or video blogger. The good thing is that the blogosphere is peopled by helpful folks who are generous with their knowledge. Through their intercession, you meet mentors who can give you a good head start.

8. Keep the faith. The lack of interaction in a new web author's blog is a right of passage. Live with it because it's your baptism of fire. In my experience, I consoled myself that I have lurkers who just might have given me the thumbs up in silence and moved on. Or they may have given me the dirty finger and moved on. I don't know, perhaps even that counts for something. It's the indifference or cold reception that that deals the killer blow.

Or so I thought. But then they come eventually, these wonderful people who take the time to give thoughtful comments. Some blew me away with their forthrightness. Some keep me in stitches. A lot of their inputs are blog posts unto themselves. Am I getting clueless? Are days of spammy "I like your your post. Please visit me at_____" over? Thank you. *hugs and kisses* :)

In a nut shell: things unfold at their natural pace. Stay the course. If you view things in perspective, you'd notice you have made progress.

9. Play the fool. It's not hard for me not to play the fool. Because I honestly feel I have some bragging rights to it. You can't keep up with the pace you set as the perfect blogger thereabouts. You simply can't. You're liable to slip up and land on your ass. It will be a remarkable sight for us all when you do. What will save the day for you is your willingness to be candid about it. Or your sense of humor.

The blogosphere is filled with authors in gray suits with stuffy demeanor. Be the dunce. And you will stand out from the crowd.

One of the loveliest comments I got was a note from Kathleen Maher in response to my post about taking some breather from blogging. Says Kathleen, "I hope you're back tomorrow, eager to 'signify nothing.' Lack of meaning has a beauty of its own. And, playing the fool is imperative if we're going to continue living."

10. Be generous. With your time. With the little resources you have. Karma will take care of you. Or a new found blog friend - an angel of sorts - will.

Don't hesitate to drop your comments when you visit your neighbors as if your thoughts were top secret recipes. Out with it. You have visited and read up on their creations. Take one more step and strike a conversation. God knows how many hours of sleep they had given up to come up with that post, or how much flak they got heaped on courtesy of their significant others ("honey, just one paragraph more and I'm done, promise."). So you had better take the time, too. To let him know you appreciate his contribution.

If you're lucky, you make a connection to another human being, not just a reader for your blog.

If you're lucky like me you'd have an online friend dress up your blog. Thanks Yatot . Yes, a makeover is coming up, folks. Watch out for it. If you need Yatot's services, contact me first. I'm his boy friday and business manager all rolled into one. The magic words to make him agree to help you is to compliment him on his firm, killer ass. It works like a spell. Now, memorize that, you hear?

Of course, you can make a deal with him directly. :)

Feeding That Blog Beast

What animal do you think is the world title holder as the greediest of the lot? Elephant? Nah. Dinosaurs? Oh boy, they're instinct, man. Pigs?

Okay it's the polyphemus moth. This tan colored moth usually found in North America can eat 86, 000 times its own weight at birth. Go figure.

I bring this up because I'm feeling the pressure of feeding this baby blog. It has become a beast, demanding daily feedings. I go to work in the morning and it eyes me suspiciously as I leave - perhaps doubting if I'd bring home the bacon for its night feeding. Which is a correct assumption. Because I have doubts myself.

At work, I think up blog ideas. Where do I go this time for inspiration - shall I raid the family treasure trove of secrets and dirty linens? Or should I mine first my neighbors' antics?

But why bother. Why not post at my own pace, say thrice a week. The problem is that the baby's pediatrician named Mr. Analytics says every time I leave the baby at home to socialize my baby's vital signs drops dangerously low.

My parental instinct is thus challenged. True, I did not ask my baby if it wanted to be brought in this world. I did it entirely on my own. Now, I have to grin and bear it and wait for the time it becomes of age so I can leave it well enough alone. Angelina Jolie can of course take a liking to it and adopt it. But what are my freakin chances? Nada. My baby and I are not from Africa.

Am I missing something? Should I ask somebody to babysit once in a while so papa can play? How do you think I should handle my baby?

I Know What You Did In The Elevator

Are you an original bloke? Are you a trailblazer? Do you heed Robert Frost's advice to take the road less traveled?

Or are you just one of the herd - afraid to break from the pack? Afraid to be labeled quaint, cuckoo, touched in the head?

Perhaps after watching the video below, you'd feel a flash a recognition. That guy could well have been you. For all the blogging world to hear, you're all being the purple cow.

But deep inside, there's this nagging doubt - are you really? Or there maybe none at all.

So what makes you remarkable? What sets you apart as a person and as web author?

Yatot Wins Top Commentator For January

TYC Online Magazine author Yatot is this blog's Top Commentator for January. For this distinction, he will receive the following mouth-watering prizes from this blogger:

* The right to collar me when I show my face in Metro Manila so I can be forced to treat him to any posh dining place of his choice. Granted of course that by that time I will have earned enough money for fare and night of proper depravities.

* The rare privilege and right to go under the hood of this blog to tweak this and that. After all, he had promised doing it sometime in December. I have yet to collect on his promise, waiting for the right moment to pounce on my hapless friend.

* The exclusive rights to a pair of Mangyan g-strings and a photo shoot paid for by yours truly so Yatot, who's fond of anything cultural and indigenous to the Philippines, can properly chronicle his exploits in Mindoro.

Author's Update, 05 February: Because I woke up on the right side of somebody else's bed this morning, I'm adding a modest amount - P500 - to Yatot's prize. It's in the form of mobile airtime credits. Globe or Smart - it doesn't matter, I have both. He can also get it through Smartmoney or Western Union if he so wishes. Please send me an email so I can send you your prize.

Like many of my online friends, I have yet to meet Yatot. I don't have any ideas how he looks. All I can go by is his avatar. Has any of you seen Yatot in person or in cam? I haven't - we only swap emails. He cools his heels around here, poking here and there for something to nourish his enormous appetite for fun and banter.

Because that is what he brings to the table. His sense of fun. And irreverence. He's the gift of turning discussion into a delightful conversation between friends.

So it doesn't matter I have yet to see his picture in his YTC About Page. Is Yatot (yatot: a local term of endearment for someone thin) actually thin? Or is he a man-mountain?

It doesn't matter. Says Canadian novelist Margaret Atwood, "Wanting to meet an author because you like his work is like wanting to meet a duck because you like pate."

These things so far have proven to be irrelevant. I treasure Yatot for his friendship and his mind. And his contribution to blogging.

My friend, take your place of honor as honorary barfly in the comment section of this blog. This time drinks are on the house.

Worthy Runners-Up

Yatot edged out two worthy commentators by one point. Whew. Tied for second place are Jesse and Bingkee. Third place went to Ambo. I will have to say if Jesse is not so consumed by coming up with a perfect design for his blog he might have overtaken Yatot. The same can be said of Bingkee. But of course I unwittingly (or perhaps by design?) made it particularly unpleasant for her by unnecessarily littering the blog with polysyllabic hurdles. Peace Bingkee. Just pulling your leg.

My Twitter Friends Mosaic

These are my friends in Twitter. They are only a little over 100 so I'm posting them here. This post is totally inspired by my online friend Jaypee who posted his Twitter follower mosaic in his cool blog. Thanks Jaypee.

You can get your own twitter mosaic here.

You can also buy from the site a t-shirt with your twitter name and the first 100 followers only for only $21.95.

Twitter is such a cool micro-blogging tool. Through it, I have harassed enough misguided souls to drive by here in my blog and take a peek. Okay, maybe a dozen or two. That's a lot to me anyhow.

Through Twitter, primarily on Chris Brogan's happy tweets, I have discovered writer extraordinaire Ann of Annarchy. Thanks, Mr. Brogan. And there's short fiction writer Kathleen Maher. Well, I discovered her in Blog Catalog but it's in Twitter that I'm trying my darn best to keep in flight formation with Ms. Maher.

And there's my Pinoy Blog Idol Jhez who tried to sign me up with Plurk. I prefer melodious tweeting, however, to watching my karma. It's great he's on Twitter as well (Jhez is omnipresent in everything social media) so it's not as if had snubbed him after all.

Lots of interesting stories in Twitter. And colorful characters, too. Sign up, if you haven't already. You can follow me at Twitter here.